I am not on the pulse of pop culture as I once was. It’s a shame really. Back in the day I could have been a contender on that obscure little MTV game show, Remote Control. But at least I still surround myself with people who are very hip, particularly my true blue pal “Pauline” who sent me a link recently for this Mary J. Blige video “Just Fine.”

In fact she challenged me in her email…”Please, please give it a listen. This is my new gym jam baby! It’ll make you happy! Just try not to dance. And the line about “I like what I see when I’m lookin’ at me when I’m walkin’ past the mirror”..Sassy!”

And it’s no wonder Pauline loves this song. She’s a “have-no-fear-pick-yourself-up-by-your-boot-straps-go-for-it-gal.” This is the girl whom I met as she was unpacking boxes on our first day of college in 1989.

She was (and still is) tall and brunette. I am just 5′4 and at the time had a head of very bad frosty blonde.

She was a tower of college confidence and read Vogue magazine. I was homesick and self-conscious and still wore pleated jeans. Insert fashion shudder here.

It was an instant yin and yang relationship. Fueled by our mutual love of acting ridiculous, dancing to Janet Jackson songs, and scheming to circumvent the due process needed to enter establishments that were of a 21+ nature, we were two peas in a college pod. But one of the best things about Pauline, even as we approach our 20-year anniversary as a dynamic duo of goofiness, is that she never lets me feel sorry for myself for too long. She calls me on the carpet when she feels she needs to, particularly when I’m feeling a bit buried in the weeds of motherhood and need a jolt of tough love to get out of it. And boy do I love her for it.

So after a few recent weeks of being winter stir-crazy, moody and a bit off my game, I listened to this song a few times. This is a “get-your-groove-back-positive-attitude-buck-up-there- girlfriend-we-are-all-fabulous” song.

So I highly recommend that whatever mental state you are currently in, you spend four minutes with Mrs. Blige. And better yet, picture yourself in the video. Seriously. It’s awesome.

In my version, I am standing on the sidewalk at my favorite neighborhood shopping plaza, T.J. Maxx to my right, a Staples office superstore to my left. I’m standing in my puffy winter jacket, arms wide, singing my heart out while funky, electric lights stream out of my hands, just like Mary. And in the part where she’s glamming it up in the mirrors, I’m walking past the bank, checking out my reflection in the window as I push a stroller with a bit of extra sass in my step.

“So I like what I see when I’m looking at me when I’m walking past the mirror.
No stress through the night, at a time in my life ain’t worried about if you feel it.
Got my head on straight, I got my mind right I ain’t gonna let you kill it.
You see I wouldn’t change my life, my life’s just fine, fine, fine, fine, fine…”

So, every now and then, I spend some time in a bit of a funk. But then it’s time to regroup, spend a cathartic hour scrubbing the unexplained food cement that’s adhered to the kitchen floor, plan a date night with my husband and dance to the music.

And that’s just fine, fine fine, fine, fine.